Grammer related in cvs: 20020920, patch included
Bill Maltby LFS Related
lfsbill at wlmcs.com
Sat Sep 21 19:34:18 PDT 2002
I got to it again. I hope this is useful. Two things to watch for with me.
First, I don't XML, but it looked simple enough as long as I was only
editing already existing things. Second, some of the changes may not be
desirable, for reasons of which I am not aware. Ignore as appropriate and
no post about it is needed - you have enough to do.
Hope it's mostly useful.
"For example" appears twice - the second one is redundant. Also, the
display of commands is inconsistent with those just prior. Patch
corrects that also. Original was:
in Chapter 4. For example, let's assume that the LFS partition is
mounted on /mnt/lfs.
For example when you are told to run a command like ./configure
--prefix=$LFS/static you actually have to execute ./configure
Changed the following line so folks get to thinking "su -", from:
... time you login as user root, or you 'su' to user root
... time you login as user root, or you 'su -' to user root
Corrected spelling of accurate
Eliminated a redundancy in the following:
SBUs don't work on SMP machines. We've seen that SBUs don't ...
Where to store the downloaded software:
Suggested intent and wording change from:
This just makes sense because you would still have access to those
files when you boot into the LFS system.
This just makes sense because you need to have access to those those
files when you chroot to $LFS and when you boot into the LFS system,
although access when booted to $LFS could be handled other ways.
How to install the software:
I suggest that the following have the "-" prepended to "xvf", since
this is the way GNU goes for everything they get in their hands.
tar xvf filename.tar
Dropped "first" to Eliminate redundancy in the following:
Before such files can be used they need to be uncompressed first.
Change wording in the following from:
... book (for example re-using the source trees from Chapter 5 for
use in Chapter 6), it may ...
... book (for example re-using the source trees from Chapter 5 in
Chapter 6), it may ...
Change wording from:
... after you enter the chroot'ed environment.
... after you enter the chroot environment.
Add a comma and change wording from:
... Nothing will use the kernel tree so the ..,
... Nothing before then will use the kernel tree, so the ..,
Add commas from:
... LFS intends to be as far as possible platform
... LFS intends to be, as far as possible, platform
How to ask for help:
Remove inappropriate parenthesis from:
... to help you. (An overview of the LFS mailing lists can be found
in Chapter 1 - Mailing lists and archives.)
... to help you. An overview of the LFS mailing lists can be found
in Chapter 1 - Mailing lists and archives.
Things to mention:
Correct sentence ending with a preposition from:
the package or section you are having problems with,
the package or section giving you problems,
This file contains possible errors encountered during configure
which aren't always printed to the screen.
This file may contain errors encountered during configure which
weren't printed to the screen.
The screen output from both the ./configure script and when make is
The screen output from both the ./configure script and the make run
Added commas and reworded from:
... whole section as quoted above is what should ...
... whole section, as in the example above, is what should ...
... follow the hints in this document and ...
... follow the hints in that document and ...
Well, hope you don't think I'm just too picky!
billm at wlmcs.com
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